I AM PO'
I'm so fucking poor, I can't even muster up the goddamn energy to say the last half of the fucking word. That's why I shop at Forever 21. Even though their clothes are about as durable as fucking Great Value tp, I go back week after week to purchase their overly trendy drivel because there is no fucking way I'm buying Walmart knock-offs by Miley Slutzilla Cyrus. I'd rather shove three bucks across the overly-glittered, fake marble checkout counter to the bisexual asshole in pleather harem pants at my local F21 (which buys me at least four owl necklaces and a feather cape). Still, every time that emo douche peers at me judgmentally past his curtain of greasy, black bangs, I can't help but feel like I am selling my goddamn soul.
That is why I would give you a solid handjob if you can get me a dress under twenty bucks. I would eat you till the world ends baby. And here is Britney Spears singing about it to prove to you I mean BUSINESS. Just replace any verb in the song with fuck and enjoy.
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